The start of the year was filled with some trepidation in that I had only just started a new job and was already facing an eye operation. As I was on probation it couldn’t have come at a worse time. Unfortunately things took a turn for the worse as within minutes of going under the anaesthetic I started having complications and had to revived immediately. I won’t forget the night I spent in hospital shaking violently from the anaesthetic. It was literally third time lucky before I had my final operation. In the end I spent almost 3 months off work due to complications and waiting for the next available surgery slot. I’ve also had to learn to live with only seeing things in “one-half D” as the sight in my right eye hasn’t returned to what it was. C’est la vie!

While returning to work after being off for so long presented its own challenges, it took a while for me to get back into the groove and find my mojo. But it’s just like riding a bike, you never forget (unless you’ve never ridden at all…!).

As far as holiday’s went I stayed home and carried on working while the rest of my family stayed in sunny Somerset for a few weeks over Summer. This didn’t mean that I had no time off, in fact I had 25 days leave to use up before the end of the year! So I’ve had more time off than most people get to have!

2011 wasn’t all full of doom and gloom there were some good things too. Although I had missed seeing my all time favourite band Rush on their Time Machine tour due to lack of cash and steep ticket prices I was able to get involved in designing and managing the Rush convention website http://www.rusheucon.co.uk/.

Because of shift rota’s I was in no position to make the pilgrimage north of the border to Glasgow. A shame really as they’re a great bunch and I haven’t seen many of the gang since 2007. I’m involved in the refresh of the site again for next year’s convention, hopefully the gods of Olympus will smile on me and say “You can go Mike!”. One thing’s for sure I’ll need to get some serious drinking practice in so I can get in shape for the carnage that is EuCon!

I also got involved in hosting not only my own website but also a Minecraft and Garry’s Mod server http://www.nightmaresurvival.co.uk/. As a result of this I succumbed and finally got myself a copy of Minecraft. Hopefully in the next year I’ll be in a position to upgrade the server.

To be honest most of this year has flown by with constant work and lots of laughs in between. When I think of some of the places I’ve worked (like “Spacely Sprockets”) and how people were treated I consider myself to be very fortunate to be where I am. My wife says that I’ve always come home from work happy and that speaks volumes! It also goes without saying that when you get a *nice* Christmas bonus and not a year’s membership in the “Jelly of the month club” (National Lampoons Xmas Vacation) makes for a great end of year gift.

Looking back I think that this year has probably been one of the better ones I’ve had. There are more ups than downs this time. Back in 2010 I was at the threshold of hell with all the problems of being out of work during a recession. This year I feel like I’m clawing my way back slowly and am finally on the road to recovery.

So here’s wishing you all a successful and prosperous New Year wherever you are! Now where’s my beer

The majority of these scripts will happily backup a single world. However, if you are running either the “nether” world or other worlds alongside your main one then you may have difficulties.

There have been a few scripts that use array values fed into a loop to backup both worlds:

# Declare Worlds to be backed up
declare -a worlds=(world world_nether)

# Get number of worlds
numworlds=${#worlds[@]}

# Backup Worlds
for ((i=0;i<$numworlds;i++)); do
BFILE="${worlds[$i]}.$STAMP.tar.gz"
CMD="tar -czf $FINALDIR/$BFILE $SRCDIR/${worlds[$i]}"
done

Unfortunately this approach doesn’t seem to work too well in Debian based Linux distributions. The issues I was running up against were that only one of the worlds would be backed up and the other completely ignored for no apparent reason. In an attempt to get to the cause of the issue I discovered that if I typed the tar command with the full path in the shell it worked without a hitch. However, when entered in the bash script inside the loop it would only partially run without rhyme or reason.

After several days of scouring forums for alternative backup scripts I discovered that the issue was not to do with either the script or the tar command itself but in how it was called. A search on the eval command and its use revealed the solution… The problem with the CMD string is that the bash shell doesn’t parse it correctly, but if you add the eval command to call the function it works correctly!

# Backup Worlds
for ((i=0;i<$numworlds;i++)); do
BFILE="${worlds[$i]}.$STAMP.tar.gz"
CMD="tar -czf $FINALDIR/$BFILE $SRCDIR/${worlds[$i]}"
eval $CMD
done

So there you have it! A single line added to the loop that resolves the issue and allows for multiple worlds to be backed up separately.

* For the uninitiated the terms “griefer” and “griefing” relate to acts of deliberate vandalism of other people’s creations within Minecraft worlds. Think of a group of <insert slang phrase for your country/region> vandalising and terrorising your neighbourhood and you get the general idea.

I recently decided to purchase a copy for myself and as it was still reasonable priced while in beta it was hardly a King’s ransom.

What seemed really strange was the feeling that I felt like a complete n00b playing the game and trying to figure out what things do and how they work. Gradually I found myself being drawn into the minecraft forums and the wiki, not to mention a slew of YouTube videos.

Minecraft is one of those games that breaks the mould and lets you do your own thing as opposed to other mainstream games where there is some objective. In Minecraft the only objective is to have fun!

Now I’m not going to bore you with an at length discussion of the features. There’s so much coverage of Minecraft out there on the web there’s nothing that you can’t find out if you just try looking…

Anyway, I spent considerable time getting lost and found that the Minecraft Topographical Survey program was an essential in generating maps so you can see where you’ve been. Without a compass and the only hint that the clouds always travel to the West I set about building some useful navigation aids. I’ve built huge arrows pointing in the direction of home and lit them with torches so they could be seen at night. I’ve also been building more intrepid creations. My latest one is a huge castle over 3 levels with towers on each corner.

For me playing Minecraft is very relaxing after a loooong day at work and helps me to relax and just enjoy playing “the game” *

* “The Game” is a peculiar game that some people play at work. The rules are really simple… The object of the game is not to think about the game, if you do then you’ve already lost!

an awesome storyline coupled with first rate character development

Originally aired in Japan in 2001 as a 26 part series. Noir is a story filled with mystery, suspense and shock revelations. The story centres on Mirielle Bouquet, an assassin by trade, tall, blonde and deadly with a message to contact a young girl called Kirika whose past life is shrouded in mystery…

Through the course of the story the main characters join forces and start operating under the moniker of Noir, a term used by the underworld for an assassin of the highest calibre. As a result of this partnership they start to draw attention to themselves from a secretive organisation with aims to eliminate them, or so it seems…

As story advances many things about the characters come to light and that they are players in a game of cat-and-mouse as their enemies track their every move resulting in terrible sacrifices that take their toll. But who is pulling the strings behind the scenes?

As for the finale… Well you’ll have to watch the series to find out!

Noir has an awesome storyline coupled with first rate character development and plenty of fast paced gunplay. Don’t miss it!

Sidenote: American TV channel Starz are currently looking at creating a live-action version of the series. Here’s hoping they don’t screw it up like so many remakes…

Lie To Me

One of the worst things you can do when speaking to Technical Support is to lie. Ok maybe lie is a tad harsh, lets say being “economical with the truth” about their setup and what they have done.

People these days seem to be so certain that the fault lies with their ISP and that it cannot possibly be “their” equipment at fault. So what they do is rattle of a list of things they have tried to the support agent and think that by telling us what we want to hear we’ll send out an engineer like that’s really going to fix things.

Here’s a typical example of what I am on about…

“Do you have anything else connected to the line e.g. Sky+ box, alarm system or fax machine..?”

“No we’ve got nothing”

“I just need to put you on hold while I run some tests”

Switches to 2nd line and calls the number the broadband is on and hears a fax tone…

“Sorry to keep you waiting. Are you sure you don’t have a fax machine connected as I’ve just called the line and can hear a fax machine!”

Customer realising they’ve dug themselves into a hole makes some lame excuse to cover themselves.

The best advice for getting yourself out of a hole when speaking to Technical Support is to stop digging! Remember that Technical Support is there to help you… Would I lie to you..?

Diagnostics and why they matter.

The first step in troubleshooting faults is to perform a diagnostic check by running through various tests. For example when you see the Doctor he/she will ask you what you think is wrong and from that ask a series of questions to narrow down the cause of your illness.  We come across may examples of people who are simply unwilling to perform any diagnostics when they are having problems with their internet connection.

Now when most people hear a support agent tell them that the will have to perform diagnostics it fills them with fear. Performing diagnostics is easy! So why are people reluctant to do them?

The reason that most people don’t like doing them is that they expect to fix the problem in one go. With broadband there are many things that can go wrong and it takes a careful approach to get to the real cause of the problem.

So for those customer’s who are afraid/unwilling to perform diagnostics I have devised the following analogy.

Would you pay an electrician to change a lightbulb..?

Seems like a simple question doesn’t it? And while it doesn’t appear to have anything to do with broadband it is very relevant to performing diagnostics.

The majority of people would respond a resounding no. Ask them why and they’ll tell you how you get charged through the nose for 5 minutes of work. They’ll tell you that they could do it themselves for nothing!

Ask the customer why should they change the lightbulb? Surely it’s the responsibility of their electricity supplier as its their electricity that must have caused the bulb to blow, or that the electricity must be faulty as there’s nothing wrong with the bulb.

Is this starting to sound absurd to you..? Now ask the customer to imagine that a BT engineer is coming to look at their lights… What would he do..?

Tell them he’ll get out his ladder, take the bulb out of the socket and connect his meter and check for electricity. He’ll then tell you that there’s nothing wrong with the electricity and that your bulb’s blown. So you ask him if he’ll fix it and he’ll say “Oh sorry mate/luv that’s not on my worksheet” and leave you sat there in the dark knowing that the bulb has blown and that it has just cost you. That’s right when BT find no fault the visit becomes chargeable and can be anything up to a whopping £240! And you’ll still have to buy your own bulb!

Hopefully at this stage the customers’ just realised that 5 minutes worth of work over perhaps several days in some fault cases is chump change compared to what BT will charge (which can be anywhere up to a whopping £240!).

Where people go wrong with diagnostics is they try too many things all at once. This usually has one of three outcomes:

1. No change
2. It’s gone worse
3. It’s fixed (but I don’t know what it was!)

Now there’s a golden rule for performing diagnostics…

Change only one thing at a time

• So, make one change.
• Observe the result e.g. no change/better/worse (if not sure ask Technical Support to check from their side) sometimes you need to wait so be patient.
• If no change, try the next step on the list. If better, you’ve fixed it! If worse go back one step and try again.

It’s really just like following the instructions on a bottle of shampoo… rinse, wash & repeat! Easy when you know how!

In this final part I’ll cover some invaluable tips and tricks on how you can get the best speeds and stable connection possible.  I’ll also cover some tips you can use when dealing with your own ISP and how to get them on your side.

Being cheap will cost you dear in the long run…

Routers can frequently cause problems, especially some of the cheaper ones.  Most ISP’s recommend or even supply certain brands based on their performance and not solely on cost. In my experience the following routers are typically recommended :

Netgear DGN1000 series (including the 2000 & 3000 series)
Thomson Speedtouch 585v7 & 8
Draytek Vigor 2820 & 2900 (if you need advanced features etc.)

Now this doesn’t mean that other makes of routers are bad but it might be wiser to stick to routers that are known to be stable.  I’ve had some experiences with TP Link routers for example which can sync at higher speeds but frequently drops the connection. 

Router settings – now pay attention Bond! If you own a Belkin, Cisco or Linksys router, deep in the setup there is a setting called “Dial On Demand” which is usually enabled.  Whatever you do make sure that you disable it and set the idle timeout to “0″ so that the connection stays on… always! 

I have seen a large number of so called “intermittent” problems go away simply by disabling this feature.  There is also another reason to turn this off is because if you do have some kind of intermittent line, dial on demand effectively “masks” the problem and makes it a lot harder for the Support guys to fix as we can only see what is actually going on and not the true picture.

Extensions are evil. The cheap 20 metre extension going upstairs that you bought from the local pound shop can cause more problems than you can possible imagine.  If you really need internet upstairs use wireless or run up some Ethernet cable and you’ll have less problems that way.

Turning you router off and on repeatedly. This is bad, why? Well its because this one action can drop your speed without you even knowing it. Now there is a good reason for this… BT has something called an automatic line management system and it’s called RAMBO (Honest!).  Now Rambo is good at what he does, takes no s**t and what he says goes right!  But there is one slight flaw in that Rambo isn’t particularly smart. Rambo cannot tell that the customer turns off their router at night and back on in the morning, all he sees is it goes off and on more times than a light bulb and so he “fixes” it because that’s what he does and you wake up one morning and then discover your speed has slowed down.

This is because you have had you profile changed, usually to a lower value, by Rambo’s good intentions.  This can also happen when there is a genuine problem on the line and it’s tried to fix it as best it can.  Imagine that you are talking with someone who is talking way too fast…  Did you catch everything they said, I’ll bet you didn’t and you had to ask them to repeat it again.  So how do you fix this situation, easy all you need to do is to ask the other person if they can “slow down” until you can understand everything they say.  This example on YouTube (4:14) is the best explanation I’ve ever seen it’s hilarious!

How to deal with Technical Support

Ask a group of people for their impressions of Technical Support staff and you’ll probably hear the same description e.g. spotty, know it all’s that speak technobabble…  Now if you do suffer from skin oil problems, are young and work in Technical Support then you have my apologies and also a recommendation to use a dermatological face scrub and you’ll feel so much better!

Now not all Technical Support people are created equal, there’s Technical Support and then there’s Technical Support.  For the majority of people their experience of technical support will probably come from an outsourced call centre on the other side of the world staffed by people who are so obviously reading from a script that it hurts and if your problem isn’t listed they will drop your call.  Sad but true I know. For some ISP’s technical support is just a person reading of a list and asking you to perform tasks that appear to be meaningless with no explanation as to why you need to do this.

There are a number of independent providers in the UK who do think differently in that they employ staff with the technical know-how and the ability to talk to a customer like an ordinary person.  Because their staff are based in the UK it means not having to deal with the issues of language and cultural barriers that can arise from using overseas call centres.  Now these services are not cheap but you must remember that being cheap will cost you dear in the long run.

When it comes to getting Technical Support on your side it is important to remain calm and speak to them the way you would like to be spoken to.  A little politeness goes a long way in these situations.  Tell them exactly what you have and what changes no matter how insignificant you have made.  Ask them what they want you to do next and let them know if anything changes.

Customers need to know that the Technical Support guys (and gals) are trying to help them but there are limits on what we can actually do.  All we have is our in-house systems that show us what things look like from here, our voices, technical know-how and our patient nature.  The rest as they say is up to you!  So when a Techie asks you to try something, imagine that you’re them and you’re trying to fix a problem with a blindfold on, if you are not sure of something don’t be afraid to ask!  The good Techies are the ones that can tell within a few sentences what your level of knowledge is and pitch things to you in a way that you can understand even if they don’t always make sense.

What to do when things turn bad

If you are not happy with the service you are getting from your ISP the first thing you should do is to complain.  Now by complain I don’t mean by screaming obscenities and making threats at the poor person on the other end of the phone because its not always their fault, they are just doing their job.

With a calm but determined approach you should be able to escalate an issue up to a Team Leader who is responsible for the actions of the other team members and can speak with some authority in trying to get your complaint resolved.

If you are not happy with the response you can request your MAC code.  At this point you may get passed onto the retentions department who will try and offer you a discount if you stay as their customer.  Remember, if you are not happy and want to leave you are free to do so as long as you are outside of your contract period which is typically 12 months.  If not, you could still leave but you will be required to pay the remaining months on your contract.

Choosing a new ISP

If you are moving house or are  unhappy with the service from your current ISP then the chances are that you will be looking to change provider.  Now before you sign up for that “super fast, super cheap” broadband deal that’s too good to be true there are a number of things you should consider:

1. What is the contract term?
2. What is the fastest speed I can get?
3. How much can I download per month?
4. Are there any speed restrictions e.g. Traffic Shaping/Throttling?
5. What do your customer’s really think of your service?

The key thing to remember is that we are all consumers of somebody else’s products and services.  So don’t get seduced by the costs but make an informed decision based on research from the internet, work colleagues and friends and family before you sign up with a new ISP.

Useful Links

There are a number of websites devoted to broadband issues. Below are a sample of the most useful ones:

• Think Broadband
• Kitz especially their Exchange line checker which is useful of you want to find out how fast your line can go.
• SamKnows another Exchange speed checker.
• ISP Review highly recommended if you are looking to change provider.

Well that brings us to the end of this series.  Hopefully you will have gained some knowledge and feel more confident in tackling broadband problems.

Important: The advice in this section is aimed at UK broadband internet users only.

Authentication – there are two ways we can test to see that the servers on BT’s side receive your password and the first one is real easy… just log into you router’s web setup and simply retype them in.  Now there are some occasions where this doesn’t work and it’s usually with routers that have been supplied by your ISP e.g. Orange, O2 and Sky etc.  In these routers the usernames and passwords are there but the have been hidden away from the customer’s view.  You can get to them if you have the right tools and know what you are doing. remember Google is your friend!

• How to get your Sky username & password.
• How to get your O2 username & password.
• How to get your Orange username & password.

Now if the re-entering your username/password doesn’t work there is another thing you can try and that is the BT Test Accounts.  Now depending on which network you are on they will vary so if one doesn’t work try the other one. You don’t need to enter a password but if your router wants a password you can use 12345 etc.

For people who can only get “up to 8Mb”
bt_test@startup_domain

For people who get “up to 20Mb”
bt_test_user@startup_domain

The thing to remember is these will not connect you to the internet, what they will do however, is test to see if the Exchange recognises the password.  You  need to look at your router’s web setup page and look for status as “connected” and an IP address in the 172.x.x.x region.  If you get an address then there may be an issue with your password and if not then there could be an issue at the Exchange. You may hear terms like the Radius server is down from your ISP.

Synchronisation – The first thing to do is see if you can get a dial tone on you phone. If you can’t then it means that your phone line is down.  Bear in mind that you can still have a broadband connection with no dial tone.  This can happen for a number of reasons such as damaged outside wiring, work being carried out at the Exchange and lastly the dreaded MSO (Mass Service Outage), this is when things get really bad like Edinburgh in Jan 2011, where thousands of customers lost their phone and broadband connections for several days.

Intermittent – typically intermittent faults tend to occur in the home and are usually as a result of the router being stuck on a cheap 20m phone extension from your local Pound shop.  It is also worth pointing out that the microfilter (or matchbox with a lead, as I sometimes describe them) can also become faulty, they are cheaply made and don’t last forever.  Normally most routers will come with two anyway. I also ought to mention that wired phone extensions can also play havoc with broadband signals especially if poorly installed or if the wiring is ancient but more on that later… with these kind of faults there are a number of things you can try in sequence.

• Firstly, begin by disconnecting any equipment sharing the phone line e.g. Sky+ boxes, fax machines etc.
• If your router is upstairs you will need to unplug it and bring it downstairs and connect it to the “Master Socket”.
• If you have a spare micro filter try swapping it and see if the connection improves (see “How to tell if there’s an improvement?” below). If you don’t have a spare then go out and buy one!
• Check to see what type of Master Socket you have, if it is a newer one then remove the two screws that hold the bottom half of the faceplate and remove the faceplate. Note that this will drop your call if you have one in progress!!!
• Quiet Line Test – using a wired telephone handset (preferably) connect it directly to the Test Socket and dial 17070 and select Option 2. You will hear a woman say “performing quiet line test” at 30 second intervals.  In between the announcements you should hear silence. Any noises, crackles or pops are a sign of a noisy line which you need to report to BT Residential as a noisy phone line.  DO NOT mention broadband in the conversation or they will tell you its not their responsibility.
• Connect the router and new filter to the Test Socket and see if the connection improves. If the connection is better then it means there is an issue with your internal phone wiring which is your responsibility, not your ISP’s and certainly not BT’s, unless they fitted the extensions in the first place!
• Run a BT speed test http://speedtester.bt.com and check to see what speed you line is delivering and what “profile” you have. This may not work if you have what is called an LLU (Local Loop Unbundled) provider e.g. Orange, O2 etc.
• As an absolute last resort try another router. You don’t have to go out and buy one if you have family or friendly neighbours, you just need something to get online with and see if the connection stabilises.

How to tell if there’s an improvement?

Now when I said “see if your connection improves” I typically hear “oh its made NO difference” which is a sweeping, all encompassing phrase the people like to use similar to “well it happens all the time…” but when questioned it actually turns out that it has only happened three times! There is a vital piece of information you need about your connection and it is called the Sync (Synchronisation) speed. You may see it listed as “Upstream” on some routers e.g. Thomson Speedtouch 585.  Now you won’t find this from going online and running a speed test. You need to log into the router’s web page and check the status where you may see something similar to the image on the left.

Now if the sync speed goes higher (the numbers get bigger) then you have a wiring problem inside your house. If there is no change then it may be the case that the line is performing at the best speed it possibly can.

Profiles

I mentioned the term “profile” earlier.  This is a value assigned to your connection which effectively “caps” your connection to the fastest speed the line is capable of while remaining stable.  The key word here is stable, no one wants a super fast connection if it drops out every 5 seconds!  This is why you need to take the speed test results with a pinch of salt as it will always show a download speed less than or equal to the profile.  Now if your profile is well below the Sync speed e.g. Sync is 8192 and the profile is 135 you definitely have some kind of intermittent connection and the first place to check is your own equipment and wiring.

Performance – Now as I have previously mentioned this type of fault is a PITA to fix as for all intents and purposes everything is actually working.  I typically recommend that customers run a virus scan and if possible also run a check for any malicious software that may have been installed without their knowledge as a first port of call.

Performance faults can often be caused by programs running in the background or viruses/trojans that are making connections from your PC to the internet. They can also be caused by having little or no wireless security e.g. allowing anyone to connect and use your connection! The first test you can do is to log into the router’s setup page and turn off the wireless.  If your connection magically improves than it means that someone has been using your internet connection without your knowledge.  To get around this you can enable a higher level of wireless security such as WPA or WPA2 which is way more secure. You should also change the passphrase used to connect to your router in case it has been compromised and that should keep the neighbours out!

When it comes to virus scanners you don’t have to run out and buy a copy of Norton (Blech!) as most of the major players have “free” antivirus programs available that are every bit as good as some of the more commercial offerings.  I typically recommend the following:

• AVG Free
• Avast
• Microsoft Security Essentials

For antispyware software I recommend:

• Malwarebytes Anti Malware
• Super Antispyware

So that brings us to the end of Part 2 and hopefully I’ve given you some useful approaches you can use to fix your problems.  In the final part of this series I will give you some invaluable tips and tricks to keep your connection in tip top shape and also how to deal with your ISP’s support and get them on your side. Watch this space!

Authentication

Synchronisation

Intermittent

Performance

Now these terms may be difficult for a layperson to understand so here are my simplified explanations of each fault type.

Authentication – this is where the Broadband light is lit on your router but you can’t get onto the internet. This can happen because your router sends a username and password (sent to you by your provider or already setup) to prove who you (as a customer) are. Sometimes the servers at the Exchange don’t recognise your password, it may have been scrambled or incorrectly typed in, so it rejects it faster than a doorman at an exclusive venue when “you’re not on the list..”.   Another way of thinking about this is to imagine you have someone else’s house keys and you can’t get in.

Synchronisation – this is where the Broadband light is off and you can’t get onto the internet. Think of your router “talking” to the Exchange if it makes it easier to understand. This can be a bit more serious.

Intermittent – now these pesky ones can be hard to fix without getting the customer to do some basic tests. Yes I know… if I could have a £1 for every time I’ve heard “but I’ve already done that last time…” I wouldn’t need to work ever! Now intermittent faults are exactly that. Sometimes your connection’s is on and sometimes it’s off. Broadband is not an always on service and can drop connection several times a day. Personally I consider anything up to 4-5 times a day as normal, more than that, I would say there is a more serious problem somewhere… I tend to describe intermittent faults similar to being a detective, in that you have a list of suspects, evidence and it requires a process of elimination to bring the dastardly culprit to justice (Damn you cursed microfilter!).

Performance – these faults are the worst to track down as for all intents and purposes everything actually works. All the customer is complaining of is poor speed, iPlayer stuttering etc. We still run through the basic checks to make sure we haven’t missed anything but as you may have guessed by now things get more tricky as there is often nothing obvious.

Well hopefully that wasn’t too hard to understand! Now I’ll cover some checks you can do or have been asked to do by your ISP and what they are all about…

The first thing to be aware of is the mysterious “Test Socket”. How do you know if you have one? What does it do? Well I describe it as “having a line running across the middle as if it comes apart in half” and it should look like the one in the picture on the left.

If you remove the two screws and pull away the faceplate you will see that there is an identical socket “hidden” behind the main one… There is a good reason for this as BT are only responsible up to this socket. Everything beyond that is the customer’s responsibility. The Test Socket disconnects any extensions wired into the faceplate giving you a direct connection to your green cabinet and the Exchange.

OK, so what if you haven’t got a socket like that one… Well in that case I’m guessing that your wiring has been in place for well over a decade and BT has not been to fit a new socket. It’s quite possible that you have what is called an “old style” master socket possibly with something called a “junction box”. This is seriously old school wiring here, perfectly good for voice calls, but the kiss of death to broadband. Call BT and explain and they may fit one free of charge as it saves them grief in the future…

There is one other socket that can sometimes be found, it looks like a double socket but has markings for Phone and ADSL.  This is called a Service Specific Face Plate (SSFP) or a filtered faceplate.  These types of sockets have a built-in filter so you don’t need to fit one on each extension in your property. There is however one problem with these in that it is quite common for the filter to fail and cause more problems.

Now you may be wondering “why can’t you just send out BT to sort this out”, there is a simple answer to this. Firstly, if BT visit your property and say the fault is with your wiring or equipment you may be liable for a charge of £150 + VAT and secondly BT will not always send out an engineer if they are not satisfied that the customer has done all the basic checks as advised by their ISP.

So that’s it for Part 1. In the next thrilling instalment I will be covering “how to fix” some of these problems and the things you can do to improve your connection. So stay tuned!

This month there were only two things preying on my mind. Firstly, it was my 3 month review which had me full of trepidation as its been a while since I was last in permanent employment. I had a meeting with my Team Leader and had an hour’s worth of discussion about my performance to date. Thankfully he doesn’t have too many concerns but just wants me to “up my game” some and start handling more support calls. In terms of future development he wants to push me towards working on the hosting side of things with a view to spending time on the hosting desk one day a week on a rota. So in the end it wasn’t too bad. I know what I am doing right and so far I am on course to pass my probation period (though it isn’t guaranteed).

The second, and in my opinion more worrying other activity was going into hospital for my eye operation. On Monday the 24th January I was admitted to The Royal Oldham Hospital for surgery. I had done everything that I had been instructed to do and was expecting everything to go as planned. After what seemed like an eternity of form filling I was finally able to walk down to the operating theatre and was prepped for the operation. This is where things took a turn for the worse… Apparently shortly after going under the anaesthetic I started to bringing up acid. The surgeon had spotted this and immediately tried to clear up the residue which resembled coffee grounds. Once they were satisfied that my airway was clear they tried again and the problem started to return and my breathing had altered, the anaesthetist called off the operation as they felt that I would not make it through.

It was a strange experience drifting back to consciousness being asked if I has actually eaten after I had been told not to. I kept trying to tell them that I hadn’t and that I had done what they asked. I spent the remainder of the day covered in something like ten blankets as I kept shaking uncontrollably while I was being hooked up to a pure oxygen supply. I tried to sleep as best I could but all I could feel in between the shaking was the pain. During the night I started to suffer acid attacks again and was given something to calm things down, only for it to start up again within half an hour. That night was an awful night where I was in a kind of half sleep, being constantly aware of things moving around me and hearing a blood pressure monitor beeping away.

Later on Tuesday morning I was visited by my wife who stayed with me while the staff were preparing to discharge me. I tell you leaving hospital was a bit like coming back from a kids party in that I had a “goody bag” of various medications. Even though the operations wasn’t completed I still have the scars (I guess) of my ordeal. My eye looked like hell and a week later still causes me some grief.

So at the moment I am at home recovering and taking things really easy.